Both sets of parents are connected with their children through genetics and psychological dynamics. Both come from different backgrounds and cultures, so the couple requires to love and respect their in-law’s thought process, customs and traditions, and culture. If initially, both the spouses condition themselves to accept their in-laws with grace, they will build a strong foundation of their relationship. A child shares a close unconditional bonding with the parents and observing that they are cared for by their partner goes a long way for a smooth and successful relationship.
1) Show Gratitude:
When your in-laws do something nice for you, your partner, or your children, let them know that you appreciate it. A quick phone call, note, or email to say thanks will go a long way to helping them see you in a positive light. Even a great dinner or nice evening together is worthy of a thank you.
2) Offer to Help:
As our parents and parents in law get old, they may want your help to go to a doctor or the bank. Offer to go with them or do the work yourself on their behalf.
3) Accept the fact that they are your beloved partner’s family:
Consider them as a family and not opponents. Many people end up spoiling their relationships with in-laws because they frame them as opponents, who always impose demands on them. The biggest culprit behind this kind of assumption is the information that we are getting access to. Try to see any given conflict from their perspective, too; treat them like family and give them the benefit of the doubt, as you enter into a disagreement. If you view things from their angle, you may understand where they’re coming from.
4) Deal effectively with advice, but Not intrusions :
Partly because of their life experiences, parents-in-law often offer advice about marriage, parenting, careers, and even decorating and landscaping. Usually, the advice is well-intentioned and even appreciated. But sometimes, it can offend younger parents and create friction. If you feel comfortable with their advice, you can even ask them what they think or how they would handle a given situation. But when the advice is unwanted and unwelcome, you can just thank them for their input but indicate that your family has to do what works for your situation. Don’t let them divide you from your partner or become an obstacle in your relationship. Your family has to come first, but try to be civil and respectful when you need them to back off.
5) Be yourself:
Just be yourself and you don’t have to act to get a place their hearts. Show that you are sincere in every single thing you do and you mean what you say in every conversation. Originality always attracts. No harm to share with them your drawbacks or weaknesses. Show your talents and abilities rather than tell
6) Stay in touch:
If you are not staying under the same roof with your in-laws, find time to text or call them once in a while. They would be touched and it would help a lot in the bonding of your new relationship. Make them feel that you acknowledge them.
Remember birthdays and anniversaries. Use an organizer to keep track of them.
If you have children, keep them updated on the newest milestones reached and make every effort to meet up as often as you can if they’re interested.
7) Support your partner:
This is their family, and always will be. If you put them in the middle of fights a lot, you’ll only breed more tension. Just try not to sweat the small stuff, and support your spouse’s position about his next of kin
Praise your partner. Whilst families are well aware of your husband or wife’s faults and failings, they don’t want you to remind them. Speak highly of your partner and mention they’re great qualities. Demonstrate the admiration, respect, love, and fondness you have for your partner. S/he is a darling son, daughter, nephew, niece, uncle, aunt, grandson or granddaughter too.
